When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. Sacha Guitry
Give a man a fish and he will have food for one day. Teach him to catch fish and he will spend all day at the lake drinking beer.
A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears. – Woodrow Wyatt
Marriage is give and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway.
Man has will, but woman has her way. – Oliver Wendell Holmes
Men. The one thing that duct tape can’t fix.
A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him. – Brendan Francis
The older theory was, marry an older man because they’re more mature. But the new theory is men don’t mature. Marry a younger one. – Rita Rudner
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.
Men who don’t understand women fall into two groups: Bachelors and Husbands. – Anonymous
Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near. – Helen Rowland
The first time you buy a house you think how pretty it is and sign the check. The second time you look to see if the basement has termites. It’s the same with men. – Lupe Velez
Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract. – Kathy Lette
A man in love is like a clipped coupon – it’s time to cash in. Mae West
There are two perfectly good men, one dead and the other unborn. Chinese Proverb
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying.
Men marry because they are tired; women because they are curious; both are disappointed. – Oscar Wilde
A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he’s finished. Zsa Zsa Gabor
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? ‘Hold my purse’. – Unknown
Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time – they’re gone. – Lenny Bruce
Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won’t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you. – Helen Rowland
The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things. – Jilly Cooper
Men should be like Kleenex; soft, strong and disposable.
A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life to be thankful for a good one. – Mae West
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
There are easier things in life than trying to find a nice guy, like nailing a jelly to a tree for example.
Men are like a deck of cards. You’ll find the occasional king, but most are jacks. – Laura Swenson
Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don’t generate a lot of interest.
It takes a woman twenty years to make a man of her son, and another woman twenty minutes to make a fool of him. – Helen Rowland
The older theory was, marry an older man because they’re more mature. But the new theory is men don’t mature. Marry a younger one. – Rita Rudner
Men are like pumpkins. It seems like all the good ones are either taken or they’ve had everything scraped out of their heads with a spoon.
There is a vast difference between the savage and the civilized man, but it is never apparent to their wives until after breakfast. – Helen Rowland